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Top 10 Ways to Get Food Poisoned and lose lots of Weight!
By admin | October 1, 2007
Food poisoning is a common but sometimes deadly illness. Symptoms include nausea, vomiting, abdominal, cramping and best of all constant and violent diarrhea that occur suddenly within 24 hours of consuming something contaminated such as food or drink. This result in loss of body water and some crap hanging around your colon. Within a short period of 24-48 hrs, an average person can end up losing 5-10 lbs!
Here is a list of top 10 ways to get food poisoned:
- Eat garbage – Literally, go to a garbage can outside a Chinese restaurant and just start eating anything you find.
- Travel to another country – For example, go to Mexico and take a sip of a tap water in the hotel you reside in. In no time, you’ll feel like giving birth to a whole load of crap.
- Leftover meal – Buy a fish sandwich from Burger King and leave it in your kitchen for 7 days in room temperature. Eat it on day 8th and you’ll start to feel wonders.
- Scrambled eggs with lots of fried onions – Make sure it’s 3-4 eggs and at least 2 onions chopped and completely fried. Eat 1AM in the morning. This’ll just stay one inch below your throat and will refuse to go lower. You’ll throw up all night long and the entire next day.
- Meatballs – Eat them in school with warm chocolate milk and your goal maybe accomplished.
- Subways – Go there at 4PM in the afternoon and buy the veggie burger. This’ll do the trick too sometimes.
- McDonald’s – Eat the breakfast, lunch and dinner meals at the same time if possible.
- Checkers – Try their shake, you’ll love it. Then try their tiny hot dogs with cheese.
- Write about it – I feel like throwing up right now.
- Read reddit and digg all day and sip on hot cheddar soup all day.
This is serious, I’ve personally encountered some of these myself by accident and they do work. Whatever you do, you’ve been warned…
Topics: General | 1 Comment »
April 27th, 2009 at 9:57 am
Hello. Great job. I did not expect this on a Wednesday. This is a great story. Thanks!